Thoughts: Friendships

I feel like a few of my close friends and I are drifting apart. There’s no specific reason as to why, but it has been something that has happened gradually over time. Initially upset about it, I tried a lot of things in hopes to “fix” the issue like spending more time with them. However, I’ve realized through my numerous attempts that maybe we’ve just simply outgrown our friendship. It’s not that I no longer like them. Our lives have both changed since we met each other. Unfortunately, we changed in different directions. Over the past few years of high school, I have definitely discovered more of who I am and what I want in life, and unfortunately, I no longer have much in common with those people.

It’s very upsetting at first, but I’ve realized that having a few true friends is better than being “friends” with everyone. One of the major issues I’ve been working on is understanding and being okay with the fact that not everyone has to like me. While it isn’t a bad quality to be well liked, I felt like it often hindered my own wants and needs. I couldn’t say no, often agreeing to things that I had not initially wanted to do. Peer-pressuring is 100% real. I tend to give into it pretty easily, which is pretty harmful on some occasions. Luckily, all the people I’ve surrounded myself with over the past few years have never encouraged me to do something that led to huge mistakes. However, it has led to a few minor regrets.

What I’ve learned over those regrets is the importance of being selective about what I choose to spend time on and who I choose to spend time with. I’m still working on understanding that my time is valuable and not wasting it on meaningless things. I do not have time for people who don’t believe in me. I do not have time for people who don’t care about me. Most importantly, I do not have time to worry about people who dislike me. This is a clique post, but life is short, and time is money. If it’s not enjoyable, you’re not doing something right.

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Thoughts: Motivation

I am currently laying in my bed, procrastinating on studying for tomorrow’s AP Gov test. I just need a little motivation, so I decided to list all the little things that motivate me…

  • The passion of Buddy Valastro on Cake Boss — I aspire to one day be as in love with my career as he is being a baker.
  • The smiles of the kids I volunteer for at my local homeless shelter — I believe every human’s main purpose in life is to help make other people’s life a little less miserable.
  • The idea of the American Dream — Holding on to the hope that I can succeed in whatever I put my mind to encourages me, while hearing other people’s success stories shows how my dreams are possible.
  • My parents — Both raised in families below the poverty line, they allow me to understand that life gets better with hard work and persistence.
  • Science jokes — (What happens when a mosquito bites a mountain climber? Nothing, because vectors can’t cross scalars) — Pursuing my goals don’t always have to be serious. Instead, it should be fun and something I enjoy.
  • Family, friends, teachers, and anyone who has helped me — Humans make mistakes and occasionally do terrible things, but in the end, they are kind at heart and care about the people they love.
  • Mistakes I’ve made — It’s sort of like brainstorming. Sometimes, you just have to get all the failures out before you can succeed.
  • Happiness — My goals in life are selfish, because I know that only by pursuing them will I gain the most happiness.

What motivates you?

Thoughts: Living Forever

I have a new argumentative assignment for my English class, and I, of course, chose a topic related to science. I’m arguing against using technology to allow humans to live forever, which is slightly contradictory to my profound love for STEM. However, there is a huge difference between curing diseases that causes death and creating medical technology to stop aging in general. Aging is a natural expected expression of biological entropy that occurs in every living organism, not a disease.

I feel like being able to live forever would be so pointless. I have always associated time with the value of time. The fact that human life is barely a blink of an eye when compared to how long the universe has been around makes life so much more precious. It’s the fact that you can’t possibly experience everything in the world that makes the things that I choose to partake in so valuable.

Plus, drastically increasing human longevity can create more problems such as overpopulation. The Earth is only meant to hold so many organisms. As human population increases, the amount of space occupied by humans will increase, which leads to other species’ extinction. Unequal deaths will also become a problem. Only the rich will be able to afford the technology to prevent aging. This creates an even more unfair division between the wealthy and poor and an even larger gap between the standard of living in First World nations compared to Third World nations.

With every new scientific discovery, there are always unintended, but harmful consequences. The issues I have listed may not be the only problems that arise. Because of the associated risks and the immorality of engineering ways for humans to live forever, I believe that scientific technology should only be used to cure diseases, but not to stop the natural process of aging.

Thoughts: College Interviews

Over the course of my college application process, I’ve had 5 college interviews so far. I’ve got to admit that they were not what I had expected. Imagining a cruel admission officer grilling me on every specific detail of my life, my hands were definitely clammy as I shook my first interviewer’s hands. However, as we sat down, I was surprised by her first question. “What do you do for fun?” I didn’t necessarily prepare for the interview, but I had only thought about answers for typical interview questions such as “Why this school?” After a quick moment of silence, I decided to be 100% genuine and tell her about the fun shenanigans my cross country team and I participated in, my love for science jokes, and visiting thrift stores. My nervousness was replaced by laughter and passion as I talked about only what was genuine rather than what I thought she wanted to hear.

After that interview, the only question I “prepared” for was the “Why this school?” question. I began treating the interviews more like a conversation with one of my favorite teachers instead of a scary admission officer who wanted to prevent me from succeeding. With less pressure in having the “perfect” interview, they became less stressful. In fact, some of the interviews even turned out to be kind of fun?

The Young Elites by Marie Lu

WOW! She did it again.

I thought Legend was amazing, but this was even better. I knew it had to be pretty great when the librarian that checked out my books confessed her love for the book. She said something along the lines of, “I could not put it down… finished it in one day.”

She was not wrong. The story line was amazing, filled with so many unexpected plot twists that I finished the book in one sitting. I swear Marie Lu has some sort of┬ásuper powers. She made me like the villain of a story. I am always for the hero, but this time I was rooting for the villain. The ending broke my heart. I’m still not over it, but I won’t spoil it for those of you who haven’t read it, yet. (Please do, you will have no regrets.)

I loved this book because of its authenticity. The characters had mixed morals. It wasn’t distinctly right or wrong. All the characters were lingering between the areas of black and white, which made it so much more realistic. Marie Lu definitely took a risk by choosing to go that route, but I believe it worked in her favor. It truly elevated the book to being more than just another fantasy story where everything magically ends up happily ever after.

Overall, 10/10 would recommend.

Jan. 21 2018 Thoughts

If I happen to change one action of the past, would it change who I am today?

I want to believe that the answer is no because I’m afraid of making mistakes that could drastically change my life. I want to believe that no matter what happened or happens, I am meant to be who I am today, because this is who I am destined to be.

However, that would be really sad. All the hard work I’ve put in would all be for nothing if either way, I end up in the same place. All the choices I’ve pondered would make no difference. My life would be pointless. I would simply be a robot running through a program someone else made. That’s why I truly believe that nothing in life is destined. I think the end is the effect of all the actions and decisions that I’ve made, rather than some predetermined destiny. I want my actions to matter. I want each hard decision made to mean something. I want my life to be my choice. I refuse to believe that we are simply living a pre-written story. While the unknown is scary, thinking that I actually have no say in the end result of my life is even more terrifying.

New Year’s Resolution: Reading

I used to be an avid reader, averaging around 2 books per week. However, since high school started, the only books I read are the ones assigned by my English teaches, so one of my “New Year’s resolutions” is to read more books. My goal is to read 50 books by the end of this year. So far, I’ve read A Wrinkle in Time by Madeleine L’Engle and Everything, Everything by Nicola Yoon.

A Wrinkle in Time is a great book, but honestly, I don’t think it held up to the hype everyone had for this book. It was just disappointing because everyone kept telling me how great this book was, so I had unbelievably high expectations. Nonetheless, it does have an exciting plot line and extremely likable characters. I heard the movie is coming out soon. (And with Oprah?!) I’m super excited to see how they’re going to portray the tesseract.

On the other hand, my friend told me how bad the movie of Everything, Everything was, so I did not have very high hopes for this book. But I thought the book was amazing. I honestly couldn’t put it down. I started the book around 10pm thinking that I would read for an hour and then fall asleep. Nope. Not the case at all. I was awake until 3:30am reading this book. It was so addicting, and I just kept wanting to know what happened next. Hopefully, I’ll have time to watch the movie to see if the movie version is truly as bad as my friend had described.